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How
many dogs does it take to change a light bulb?
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1.
Golden Retriever: The sun is shining,
the day is young, we've got our whole
lives ahead of us, and you're inside
worrying about a stupid burned out
bulb?
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2.
Border Collie: Just one. And then I'll
replace any wiring that's not up to
code.
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3.
Dachshund: You know I can't reach that
stupid lamp!
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4.
Rottweiler: Make me.
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5.
Boxer: Who cares? I can still play
with my squeaky toys in the dark.
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6.
Lab: Oh, me, me!!!!! Pleeeeeeeeeze let
me change the light bulb! Can I? Can
I? Huh? Huh? Huh? Can I? Pleeeeeeeeeze,
please, please, please!
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7.
German Shepherd: I'll change it as
soon as I've led these people from the
dark, check to make sure I haven't
missed any, and make just one more
perimeter patrol to see that no one
has tried to take advantage of the
situation.
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8.
Jack Russell Terrier: I'll just pop it
in while I'm bouncing off the walls
and furniture. (how
true)!
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9.
Old English Sheep Dog: Light bulb? I'm
sorry, but I don't see a light bulb!
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10.
Cocker Spaniel: Why change it? I can
still pee on the carpet in the dark.
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11.
Chihuahua
:
Yo quiero Taco Bulb. Or "We don't
need no stinking light bulb."
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12.
Greyhound: It isn't moving. Who cares?
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13.
Australian Shepherd: First, I'll put
all the light bulbs in a little
circle...
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14.
Poodle: I'll just blow in the Border
Collie's ear and he'll do it. By the
time he finishes rewiring the house,
my nails will be dry.
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How
many cats does it take to change a light bulb?
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Cats
do not change light bulbs. People
change light bulbs. So, the real
question is:
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"How
long will it be before I can expect
some light, some dinner, and a
massage?"
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ALL
OF WHICH PROVES, ONCE AGAIN, THAT
WHILE DOGS HAVE MASTERS, CATS HAVE
STAFF!
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WHY
GOD MADE PETS
They help
out around the house...
They
protect our children ...
They look
out for the smaller ones ...
They show
us how to relax .. 
They
"converse" with each other .
They help
you when you're down .
They are
great at decorating for the Holidays .
They have
"great" expectations
They are
Patriotic .
They are
happy to "test" the water
They love
their "teddies"
They know
who's "BOSS"
..
AND - They
know when we need a good LAUGH!
HAVE YOU
SMILED TODAY?????
It is done
by moving the corners of the mouth upward.
LET ME
SHOW YOU HOW..............
NOW PASS
IT ON, AND MAKE SOMEONE ELSE SMILE!!!
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